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Joke of the day........

1 lurker | 506 watchers

Diogenes Nov 2020 8:25am, 3 Nov 2020 54,444 posts	0 Diogenes I’ve got some electric ones you can borrow.
colindglen Nov 2020 12:52pm, 3 Nov 2020 1,026 posts	0 colindglen I have a friend who is a pilot for Virgin Atlantic but, because of the second lockdown he's off work, l asked him if he fancied doing a bit of electrical work for me while he's at a loose end and he jumped at the chance. l must say, he made a lovely job of the socket. . .
Brunski Nov 2020 2:01pm, 3 Nov 2020 1,745 posts	0 Brunski Walking home after a girls' night out, two women pass a graveyard and stop to pee. The first woman has nothing to wipe with, so she uses her underwear and tosses it. Her friend, however, finds a ribbon on a wreath, so she uses that. The next day, the first woman's husband phones the second woman's husband, furious: "My wife came home last night without her panties!" "That's nothing," says the other. "Mine came back with a card stuck between her butt cheeks that said, 'From all of us at the fire station, we'll never forget you.'"
um Nov 2020 2:50pm, 3 Nov 2020 3,613 posts	0 um colindglen ... and I thought that was going to be 'landing lights' ....
PK Nov 2020 4:30pm, 3 Nov 2020 358 posts	0 PK .. That's where I was going Um.
colindglen Nov 2020 6:48pm, 3 Nov 2020 1,028 posts	0 colindglen Trying not to be too obvious
Diogenes Nov 2020 6:54pm, 3 Nov 2020 54,468 posts	0 Diogenes I could’ve been a world champion snooker player, but I never got the breaks.
Chrisity Nov 2020 10:27pm, 3 Nov 2020 18,273 posts	0 Chrisity I wanted to be a postman, but i couldn't deliver.
PK Nov 2020 8:43am, 4 Nov 2020 361 posts	0 PK Did you hear about the mechanic who built an eco-friendly car? Had a wooden engine, wooden wheels and wooden seats. wooden go.
Pothunter Nov 2020 7:00pm, 4 Nov 2020 3,194 posts	0 Pothunter I married my wife for her looks... ...but not the ones she been giving me lately.