|
Dec 2011
5:29pm, 2 Dec 2011
10,283 posts
|
HellsBells
perfect example - my 16 year old came home from school this evening and said oh, you're out of hospital. Have you been shopping yet? There's no yogurt!
|
|
Dec 2011
5:31pm, 2 Dec 2011
9,217 posts
|
sheri3004
There isn't much that is more entirely self-centred than a teenager....
Hope you're feeling OK, HB.
|
|
Dec 2011
5:34pm, 2 Dec 2011
10,665 posts
|
elfpint
I support kinship carers in my job and we have a few grandparents who look after their teenage grandkids. I think they find it especially difficult because of the generation gap but also because some of these kids have been to hell and back and they don't want to upset them.
Pesto - I don't think i really was THAT foul. My teenage years were very dark and pretty damaging and my parents handling of normal teenage stuff was part of that.
|
|
Dec 2011
5:37pm, 2 Dec 2011
27,130 posts
|
Max71
It sucks when I hear of peopel having hard times...... my mother could have written an epic account of me as a teen.
I'm the parent of a teenager, and somehow I've lucked out and got the most amazing teenager I could ever have asked for. For most of his life it's been just us living together during the week (Lives with his dad at weekends) I dont know how this happened, he's just a really nice person. Considering I was the devil incarnate from the earliest age all I can think is that it's some sort of resseive gene.
He communicates, does his chores, does his homework, his bedroom looks like Beruit, but I dont care as that is his space on the planet. I am very strict and he has to be accountable for his actions, I will not accept a mumbled response when I ask a serious question. He knows there are times we can negotiate, and times I rule without question, he knows it's his job to find out which rule applies to each situation.
I really like being the parent of a teenager.
Tring, I do hope they come back to beings yours soon.
|
|
Dec 2011
5:48pm, 2 Dec 2011
9,218 posts
|
sheri3004
It's a bit like walking a tightrope sometimes...
I don't think I have ever said "I don't like you". I have certainly felt angry and frustrated (mainly when I just couldn't get him to engage with stuff I thought was important). However I can remember my stepfather, in particular, saying very hurtful things to me as a teenager which have always stayed with me so I've really tried not to do that. (To be fair though, son is so laid-back it would probably be water off a duck's back anyway.) Having said that if he (son) was verbally abusive towards me I would find it hard not to retaliate in kind, luckily he never has been.
However there are far worse things that can be said than "I don't like you [at the moment but I still love you]" as long as the stuff in brackets is understood....
|
|
Jan 2012
11:46am, 4 Jan 2012
48 posts
|
Mizzy
I've just found this thread whilst seeking reassurance that my household fo teenagers may be "normal".
I've had a brief read through all your posts and yes, looks pretty "normal" as that seems to cover a wide spectrum. I'll come back and read in more detail when i have a bit more time later on.
I live alone with my 4 sons now aged 17, 16, nearly 14 and 11 (going on 18!!). My parenting skills are often questioned and sometimes i question myself. I threw the rule book out when they were babies as they have all been very different despite the same treatment/rearing/nurturing and theory is a wonderful thing. It's a joy to see them developing in some ways and yet in others...
I feel better just for calming down and posting.
|
|
Jan 2012
11:59am, 4 Jan 2012
3,556 posts
|
Trin
Wow... that must be hard work with 4 boys, let alone with the ages that they are... all under one roof! Respect 
I'm 'between storms' at the moment, but then my daughter is away with her bf until Sunday... I've not heard from her since New Years Eve, hope she's ok... no news is good news I guess
|
|
Jan 2012
12:51pm, 4 Jan 2012
1,078 posts
|
JaneyM
What an excellent thread - this is going on my watched list. I have a 13 year old daughter and a 16 year old son (and they are never grumpy at the same time - why can't they co-ordinate grumpiness?). No problems with my two at the moment - other than daughter being in her daily "doesn't see why she needs to tidy up" huff - but great to know there is somewhere I can head when there are probs. I love Fetch 
|
|
Jan 2012
1:06pm, 4 Jan 2012
427 posts
|
Mandymoo
V'rap I went through a very similar situation to you with our daughter when she was 13/14 and it was horrendous. I begged social services to take her into care, knew all the local police by first name terms and was threatened with court etc. My son was totally different, never really much trouble - just a typical lazy teenage boy but polite and happy to be around.
To say I never thought I would get on with my daiughter again was hard but I could not be closer to her then I am now. She is now almost 25, has a beautiful 4 year old son and is an absolute fantastic mum. She has been dealt some tough times since and is now a single Mum due to violent ex but works very hard and is a pleasure to be around.
My son is still a happy lad to be around and still quite lazy - 23 years old today.
teenagers are hard work at times, and I feel for anyone who goes through what we did,.
|
|
Jan 2012
1:27pm, 4 Jan 2012
2,144 posts
|
SarahWoo
Only just found this thread and thought I'd add my two penn'orth.
We currently have 3 teenagers at home - my stepson (17) and my two daughters (16 and 15). Up until about a year ago, my other stepson (16) also lived with us but now lives with his mother.
So, the last few years have been pretty challenging, not helped by the fact that I'm rubbish at dealing with the whole step-relationship thing.
They are all very lazy around the house and frustrate the hell out of me with their horribly messy rooms and not tidying up after themselves in the rest of the house.
The eldest daughter was a nightmare at 14/15 (temper, moods, disobedience) but is really coming through it now and seems to have gained quite a lot of maturity over the last 6 months - she certainly isn't as selfish as she was.
The youngest one is stroppy and completely self-centred. She now has a boyfriend too which seems to make matters worse (although he is a lovely boy).
My eldest step-son frustrates the hell out of me because of his general laziness and selfishness but isn't as stroppy and moody as the girls can be.
It sounds to me as though your experience is completely normal, Trin, so please don't go thinking it's you.
|
