|
Dec 2022
8:32am, 3 Dec 2022
20,277 posts
|
richmac
BREAKING :A thief has been stealing Christmas jumpers in order of size... Police spokesperson said he’s still at large...
Reminds me of...
A dwarf mind reader broke out of jail today.
Police are looking for a small medium at large.
|
|
Dec 2022
12:43pm, 3 Dec 2022
6,047 posts
|
mr d
My friend is buying his wife an artificial leg for Christmas. it's not her main present, just a stocking filler.
|
|
Dec 2022
6:59pm, 3 Dec 2022
6,057 posts
|
daz1927
Some unknown number called me, sneezed and coughed a few times, and then hung up.
I’m getting tired of all these cold calls.
|
|
Dec 2022
7:05pm, 3 Dec 2022
6,058 posts
|
daz1927
Hi Lads...
Just thought I'd let you know I have a load of knocked-off Victoria's Secret bra sets just arrived which will make fabulous Christmas gifts for your wife or girlfriend, but they're selling fast.
If you can send a photo of your wife's or girlfriend's tits, I'll let you know if we have any left that will fit.
Merry Christmas!
|
|
Dec 2022
10:29am, 4 Dec 2022
81 posts
|
dUNKle
Went out for a Christmas meal last night and all the serviettes started singing, “Chestnuts roasting on an open fire…”
Turns out it was Napkin Cole.
|
|
Dec 2022
6:22pm, 4 Dec 2022
21,130 posts
|
Chrisity
Why can't you make clothes out of cheese?
Because Fromage frays.
|
|
Dec 2022
6:31pm, 4 Dec 2022
242 posts
|
roflaherty
Why did the gingerbread man go to the doctor?
He was feeling a little crummy!
|
|
Dec 2022
8:11pm, 4 Dec 2022
7,008 posts
|
Pothunter
I’ve just seen a woman looking for her kids in Aldi. She was shouting “Rogan, Josh”.
I think she was their Nan
|
|
Dec 2022
8:12pm, 4 Dec 2022
92,904 posts
|
swittle
^ 
|
|
Dec 2022
8:08pm, 5 Dec 2022
19,837 posts
|
3M (aka MarkyMarkMark)
The shipwrecked sailor had spent several years on a deserted island. Then one morning he was thrilled to see a ship offshore and a smaller vessel pulling out toward him.
When the boat grounded on the beach, the officer in charge handed the marooned sailor a bundle of newspapers and told him, "With the captain's compliments. He said to read through these and let us know if you still want to be rescued."
|
