Joke of the day........

506 watchers

MrMole Mar 2022 3:08pm, 9 Mar 2022 136 posts	0 MrMole I was sat on the toilet, angry and late for work. I thought "I don't have time for this sh*t"
MrMole Mar 2022 3:10pm, 9 Mar 2022 137 posts	0 MrMole I hurt myself playing hide and seek. They took me to the ICU
Steve NordRunner Mar 2022 4:37pm, 9 Mar 2022 1,379 posts	0 Steve NordRunner … they told me I shouldn't have dialled emergency services and had decided to switch en route to the Burns unit. I said I might have wasted their time but that didn't warrant torture with Scottish poetry.
Diogenes Mar 2022 10:07am, 10 Mar 2022 67,885 posts	0 Diogenes My boss is a complete idiot. First he told me to get a shift on, now he says I'm inappropriately dressed!
AndyS Mar 2022 10:25am, 11 Mar 2022 1,025 posts	0 AndyS I've just read a great book: How to survive falling down stairs: A step by step guide.
Steve NordRunner Mar 2022 1:00pm, 11 Mar 2022 1,384 posts	0 Steve NordRunner News just coming in that Donald Trump suffered head trauma while having a hair transplant. He's in an induced comb-over.
AndyS Mar 2022 5:48pm, 11 Mar 2022 1,029 posts	0 AndyS Petrol is now more expensive than wine. In light of this, I will be drinking and not driving.
JRitchie Mar 2022 8:36pm, 11 Mar 2022 2,972 posts	0 JRitchie Posted on Twitter which I rather liked “Bittersweet announcement but after an amazing 2 years as an infectious disease expert I am moving on. I am now an expert in no-fly zones and Eastern European affairs. Excited to make the most of this new opportunity.”
Mushroom Mar 2022 10:44am, 14 Mar 2022 2,212 posts	0 Mushroom Are you anxious as you approach the forecourt? Sweating when you're filling up your car? Feeling sick as you see the prices keep going up? Then you're suffering from the car owner virus..
Sigh Mar 2022 11:11am, 14 Mar 2022 12,627 posts	0 Sigh My mate has just been banned from the World carpet laying Championships. Apparently, he tested positive for taking stair-rods.