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Jun 2020
1:43pm, 11 Jun 2020
1,713 posts
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Dave W
I know it must be easy to drop into the "Well so-and-so is doing this, that and the other" especially for people who have been effectively locked down since it began. But as I keep explaining to my Mum and Dad, and the MiL, it doesn't matter one jot what other people are doing. That's their choice. If you want to stay as safe as possible, then keep on isolating as much as is possible. They are all in their 80's, with various complications to health, so it just seems like the best way to me. No one actually "shielding" but pretty vulnerable nonetheless.
Difficult, I know, but I have a very great fear that if any of them were to catch it, it would be "goodnight Vienna".
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Jun 2020
1:50pm, 11 Jun 2020
7,595 posts
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jda
I find a good way to think of such people is that they are doing the "taking it on the chin" for the rest of us. Once 60% of the population have had it, the rest of us will be safe enough anyway, so they can get on with it asap as far as I'm concerned.
I know it's not that simple and that innocent victims will get caught up in it, but it's better than nothing!
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Jun 2020
2:00pm, 11 Jun 2020
2,729 posts
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Little Miss Happy
That doesn't sound good V'rap.
I try to have a similar attitude Dave but I am getting jealous of the people who are having much more normal lives because they don't perceive a risk to them and theirs.
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Jun 2020
2:16pm, 11 Jun 2020
51,611 posts
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plodding hippo
Problem is that staying in as an elderly person can lead to increasing physical and mental frailty.
Also think if I was in that situation I might make a point of seeing my family anyway. Since statistically speaking my risk of dying in the next year would be quite a bit higher than a 20 year old regardless of Covid.
Rosehip...blimey. I'd not heard about that
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Jun 2020
2:18pm, 11 Jun 2020
17,689 posts
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EvilPixie
Benz It's been tough
I speak to mum daily on facetime anything up t o 70 mins
which is hard for me too as it's draining and I don't have much to say!
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Jun 2020
2:23pm, 11 Jun 2020
2,730 posts
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Little Miss Happy
I bullied my MiL into going out for walks for that reason Hipps. Even if it's only ten minutes it's better than nothing. We've been doing distanced visiting whilst dropping off shopping etc too. I think the interaction is important.
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Jun 2020
2:24pm, 11 Jun 2020
1,718 posts
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Dave W
My good lady talks to her mum on facetime in the morning, and then probably twice a day on the phone. My mum and dad are together, but not going out a great deal, although my dad is back playing golf a couple of times a week. I try to speak to them once a day.
We could make an argument for getting the MiL up to us now, because it's only us two and the dog, in the countryside, so she'd probably be as safe here as she is at home in Leeds. But the counter argument to that is that if she comes up here and does catch it when she's been doing so well at home, then would we ever forgive ourselves?
It is very difficult knowing what's for the best on such a personal level.
A lot easier to make decisions in the abstract.. Or just "following the science"..
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Jun 2020
2:25pm, 11 Jun 2020
51,612 posts
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plodding hippo
Yeah. Tough times indeed and no easy decisions.
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Jun 2020
2:30pm, 11 Jun 2020
16,566 posts
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Rosehip
Mum and I chat using messenger - occasionally she sends me a video of her latest bit of gardening - a facetime convo sounds hard work though!
I've visited her once in her garden, my sister is closer and has been a couple of times
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Jun 2020
2:33pm, 11 Jun 2020
2,731 posts
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Little Miss Happy
That is a difficult call Dave. I guess you could go and visit her now though if you felt you were no risk to her?
It's mostly email with MiL and I but I do tend to see her at least once a week for a face to face shout across the garden.
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Coronavirus discussion thread
Feb 2024
