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May 2020
8:41am, 2 May 2020
40,941 posts
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Derby Tup
I have a friend who is a pilot for Virgin Atlantic but, because of this lockdown, he's off work, l asked him if he fancied doing a bit of decorating for me while he's at a loose end and he jumped at the chance.
l must say, he made a lovely job of the landing . . .
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May 2020
8:41am, 2 May 2020
40,942 posts
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Derby Tup
The new normal? 
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May 2020
8:46am, 2 May 2020
23,948 posts
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fetcheveryone
if (($postnumber % 10)==1) {
echo "[Removed by moderator]";
}
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May 2020
8:49am, 2 May 2020
40,947 posts
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Derby Tup
~ weeps silently into Wheetabix with huge wracking sobs ~
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May 2020
9:14am, 2 May 2020
2,892 posts
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TomahawkMike
Lockdown coping strategies: yesterday I decided to memorise 6 pages of the dictionary. I learnt next to nothing.
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May 2020
9:18am, 2 May 2020
1,772 posts
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JRitchie
Lockdown lingo - are you fully conversant with the new terminology?
*Coronacoaster*
The ups and downs of your mood during the pandemic. You’re loving lockdown one minute but suddenly weepy with anxiety the next. It truly is “an emotional coronacoaster”.
*Quarantinis*
Experimental cocktails mixed from whatever random ingredients you have left in the house. The boozy equivalent of a store cupboard supper. Southern Comfort and Ribena quarantini with a glacé cherry garnish, anyone? These are sipped at “locktail hour”, ie. wine o’clock during lockdown, which seems to be creeping earlier with each passing week.
*Le Creuset wrist*
It’s the new “avocado hand” - an aching arm after taking one’s best saucepan outside to bang during the weekly ‘Clap For Carers.’ It might be heavy but you’re keen to impress the neighbours with your high-quality kitchenware.
*Coronials*
As opposed to millennials, this refers to the future generation of babies conceived or born during coronavirus quarantine. They might also become known as “Generation C” or, more spookily, “Children of the Quarn”.
*Furlough Merlot*
Wine consumed in an attempt to relieve the frustration of not working. Also known as “bored-eaux” or “cabernet tedium”.
*Coronadose*
An overdose of bad news from consuming too much media during a time of crisis. Can result in a panicdemic.
*The elephant in the Zoom*
The glaring issue during a videoconferencing call that nobody feels able to mention. E.g. one participant has dramatically put on weight, suddenly sprouted terrible facial hair or has a worryingly messy house visible in the background.
*Quentin Quarantino*
An attention-seeker using their time in lockdown to make amateur films which they’re convinced are funnier and cleverer than they actually are.
*Covidiot* or *Wuhan-ker*
One who ignores public health advice or behaves with reckless disregard for the safety of others can be said to display “covidiocy” or be “covidiotic”. Also called a “lockclown” or even a “Wuhan-ker”.
*Goutbreak*
The sudden fear that you’ve consumed so much wine, cheese, home-made cake and Easter chocolate in lockdown that your ankles are swelling up like a medieval king’s.
*Antisocial distancing*
Using health precautions as an excuse for snubbing neighbours and generally ignoring people you find irritating.
*Coughin’ dodger*
Someone so alarmed by an innocuous splutter or throat-clear that they back away in terror.
*Mask-ara*
Extra make-up applied to "make one's eyes pop" before venturing out in public wearing a face mask.
*Covid-10*
The 10lbs in weight that we’re all gaining from comfort-eating and comfort-drinking. Also known as “fattening the curve”.
😬
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May 2020
9:22am, 2 May 2020
1,087 posts
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xt350 🇳🇿
Covidian..... child conceived during the current lock down
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May 2020
3:10pm, 2 May 2020
16 posts
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dUNKle
So Borris names son Will Law Nick Johnson
Wasn’t that what many people asked / hoped a few months back !
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May 2020
5:20pm, 2 May 2020
20,367 posts
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Nicholls595
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May 2020
5:53pm, 2 May 2020
8,119 posts
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GordonG
Fork handles?!?
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