Joke of the day........

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Derby Tup Mar 2023 9:43pm, 3 Mar 2023 58,620 posts	0 Derby Tup I've just said to our Hungarian pointer dog ho viz these jokes are really bad
Muttley Mar 2023 8:10am, 4 Mar 2023 2,280 posts	0 Muttley The doorbell rang this morning. A couple of smartly turned out young blokes, in suits and crew cuts, wanted to engage me in conversation about bread. Do I like white or wholemeal? Loaves or baguettes? What about seeded or malted? Bakery bought or homemade? It took ages to get rid of them. Bloody hovis witnesses.
Surrey Phil Mar 2023 9:47am, 4 Mar 2023 9,171 posts	0 Surrey Phil Some Jehovah's Witnesses visited and asked if they could come back next week. They never returned. I got call to say that wasn't the case and would come back the following week. Same outcome, etc. I then get a letter to say that they did return but I never saw them...
GordonG Mar 2023 7:20am, 5 Mar 2023 9,641 posts	0 GordonG What do you call a jehovah's witness who doesn't want to get involved? A jehovah's bystander
daz1927 Mar 2023 7:45am, 5 Mar 2023 6,062 posts	0 daz1927 Our local school has become an academy, it's sponsored by IKEA, standards are improving, but assembly takes ages.
daz1927 Mar 2023 7:47am, 5 Mar 2023 6,063 posts	0 daz1927 Just to let you know I'm in hospital and they are keeping me in. I’ve only gone and poisoned myself. I was munching away on what I thought was an onion, only it turned out to be a daffodil bulb. The doctors have said I should be out sometime in spring.
daz1927 Mar 2023 7:48am, 5 Mar 2023 6,064 posts	0 daz1927 If you lose one sense your other senses are enhanced. This is why people with no sense of humour have a heightened sense of self-importance.
daz1927 Mar 2023 7:59am, 5 Mar 2023 6,065 posts	0 daz1927 My doctor has prescribed me some cream for gloating... I’m just going to to rub it in.……
Steve NordRunner Mar 2023 11:22am, 5 Mar 2023 2,735 posts	0 Steve NordRunner Today's lesson in comparative musicology: Early classical sonata form - a long ABA structure Irish folk music - a short AABB structure Swedish pop music - a shit ABBA structure.
Mar 2023 7:57am, 7 Mar 2023 104 posts	0 [Removed by moderator]