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Jan 2022
12:05pm, 27 Jan 2022
24,207 posts
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Angus Clydesdale
Sad news about Barry Cryer, who died aged 86.
Apparently this was his favourite joke:
A man drives down a country lane and runs over a cockerel. He knocks at a nearby farmhouse door and a woman answers.
‘I appear to have killed your cockerel,’ he says. ‘I’d like to replace it.’ The woman replies: ‘Please yourself – the hens are round the back’.
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Jan 2022
12:07pm, 27 Jan 2022
1,314 posts
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Muttley
After six kids, Mary feels a little loose "down there" and decides to treat herself to some cosmetic surgery to tidy up. When she comes to from the anaesthetic after the procedure, she finds two bouquets of flowers in her room. The nurse tells her that the first is "from your loving husband, who's looking forward to you coming home." Mary asks about the second bouquet. "That's from Gerald in the burns unit," the nurse says. "He's thrilled with his new ears."
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Jan 2022
2:15pm, 27 Jan 2022
1,124 posts
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Dochart
BREAKING: Govt strikes exclusive deal with Wordle to release Sue Gray report one word at a time until 2028.
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Jan 2022
5:16pm, 27 Jan 2022
1,951 posts
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Brunski
RIP Barry
Man & woman in a pub having a drink together. Suddenly the man slips down his chair onto the floor under the table. The woman appears not to have noticed, so the barman seeing this goes up to the woman and says" excuse me madam, but I think you'll find your husband has just slipped under the table". The woman replies "No. I think you'll find my husband has just come through the door"
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Jan 2022
8:19pm, 27 Jan 2022
37,198 posts
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Seratonin
Thanks Muttley - that is a real LOL gag. Thanks for sharing 
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Jan 2022
9:36pm, 27 Jan 2022
13,620 posts
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Jock Itch
I'm developing a new fragrance for
introverts.
It's called: "Leave me the fuh cologne."
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Jan 2022
12:12pm, 28 Jan 2022
8,398 posts
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57.5 Days of Pain
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Jan 2022
8:57pm, 29 Jan 2022
5,706 posts
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mr d
'Tory MP steps in human excrement'
'Excrement asks if someone can clean the shit off it'
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Jan 2022
8:14am, 30 Jan 2022
66,755 posts
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Diogenes
I won my first cage fight last night.
Fucking budgie never knew what hit it.
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Jan 2022
5:08pm, 30 Jan 2022
1,317 posts
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Muttley
I asked the wine waiter if he had a Semillon. He said it was just the cut of his trousers.
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