Elderly parents or relatives to care for and/or worry about? This is the place for you.

6 lurkers | 140 watchers

Corrah 6 Aug 10:09pm, 6 Aug 2024 8,573 posts	0 Corrah Hope you can get some answers Baz. That sounds awful.
LindsD 6 Aug 10:31pm, 6 Aug 2024 69,190 posts	0 LindsD I'm so sorry. That sounds terrible. Dave, I hope it all goes well. My Mum was really pleased with her vision after her cataract removals.
McGoohan 6 Aug 10:34pm, 6 Aug 2024 54,364 posts	0 McGoohan I'm annoyed on your behalf Baz. Really frustrating times for you
geordiegirl 6 Aug 10:55pm, 6 Aug 2024 23,661 posts	0 geordiegirl Really sorry to hear this Baz hope you get some help and answers.
Little Miss Happy 7 Aug 6:30am, 7 Aug 2024 7,302 posts	0 Little Miss Happy That sounds very strange Baz. You have a medical LPoA don't you? Whilst I think that MiL being in care somewhere is probably the best thing for all of you it shouldn't happen like this. Hope it all goes ok Dave.
Bazoaxe 7 Aug 8:56am, 7 Aug 2024 27,171 posts	0 Bazoaxe I agree LMH but it’s the jump to end of life care that feels wrong when it’s all guesswork. We know MiLs wishes and if there is one thing she rejects more than a care home it is the hospital they are most likely to move her to. When she finds this out she will become impossible to speak to.
HappyG(rrr) 7 Aug 9:05am, 7 Aug 2024 50,630 posts	0 HappyG(rrr) I can't believe they wouldn't discuss it further with you Bazo. That really does sound weird. I would keep pushing to get an engagement. I think NHS are obliged to explain / consult with family about elderly care, especially a decision as big as this?
jda 7 Aug 9:22am, 7 Aug 2024 17,593 posts	0 jda I don't see how they can exclude both MiL and the family from the discussion. I mean, surely at least one of them has to be considered competent to make decisions. There's a whole process around deprivation of liberty. A consultant can't just lock someone up on a whim, at least not on anything other than a short-term emergency basis.
McGoohan 7 Aug 9:28am, 7 Aug 2024 54,369 posts	0 McGoohan I was assuming that because the hospital/consultant has spoken to BiL, that's regarded as fulfilling the duty to the family
Little Miss Happy 7 Aug 10:10am, 7 Aug 2024 7,303 posts	0 Little Miss Happy I was wondering about BiL's role in this too McG.

About This Thread

Maintained by LindsD

I thought I'd start a thread, as lots of us have elderly folks that we worry about/care for.

Useful info for after someone dies here (with thanks to grast_girl)
moneysavingexpert.com

Other useful links

myageingparent.com

moneysavingexpert.com

Who pays for residential care? Information here:

ageuk.org.uk

Advice on care homes and payment/funding

theguardian.com

Also: After someone dies, if their home insurance was only in their name, sadly the cover becomes void. But if the policy was in joint names, it will still cover the surviving policyholder (though the names on the policy will need to be updated).

A useful book of exercises for memory loss and dementia
amazon.co.uk

Pension Credit. The rules are a bit complex but if your elderly relative has some sort of disability (in this case dementia/Alzheimer's) and go into a home, they may be able to claim pension credit. So if carers allowance stops, it seems pension credit can start. It can also be backdated.

Fall alarm company, etc.

careium.co.uk

Useful Links

FE accepts no responsibility for external links. Or anything, really.

Alarm company

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Elderly parents or relatives to care for and/or worry about? This is the place for you.

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