Elderly parents or relatives to care for and/or worry about? This is the place for you.

4 lurkers | 140 watchers

LindsD Sep 2023 3:17pm, 30 Sep 2023 64,179 posts	0 LindsD I would say you're a carer. Sounds like a chunk of time, though.
Vixx Sep 2023 3:48pm, 30 Sep 2023 1,983 posts	0 Vixx That's the same sort of stuff I did for mom.
Big_G Sep 2023 4:20pm, 30 Sep 2023 2,933 posts	0 Big_G LindsD, did you mean ‘I would say you’re not a carer’? I wouldn’t consider myself as one either. But if I didn’t do the stuff I do, and keeping in mind there’s no one else to do it, I don’t think he would survive at home on his own. He should be in a care home but he doesn’t want it, and it’s his choice. But I don’t now how I’ve been categorised as a carer. Anyway, I’ve given them some feedback on the form though as when he had his leg amputation, he was basically dumped in a wheelchair at the hospital and it was just expected that ‘someone’ would get him home, which was really not easy, and I’d argue dangerous as I had to get him in the car, and then manhandle him into his house! There was no support afterwards whatsoever - I mean zero - and this is someone who cannot push himself up the bed. We’re up and running now, but it’s taken a lot of effort. Even stupid things like when he was temporarily in an out of area care home for a short time, his GP surgery was moved to near the care home. But when he went back home the GP surgery wasn’t moved back, which caused chaos.
LindsD Sep 2023 6:03pm, 30 Sep 2023 64,180 posts	0 LindsD No. I would say you are.
LindsD Sep 2023 6:04pm, 30 Sep 2023 64,181 posts	0 LindsD Exactly as you say above. Without you, he would have to be in care.
poppyH Sep 2023 10:17pm, 30 Sep 2023 2,190 posts	0 poppyH That definitely counts as being a carer big_g.
Little Miss Happy Oct 2023 11:57am, 1 Oct 2023 6,676 posts	0 Little Miss Happy FiL definitely on his way out. Unlikely he’ll last until we get back but BiL and nSiL are supporting MiL. Fortunately nSiL is currently unemployed.
LindsD Oct 2023 12:21pm, 1 Oct 2023 64,196 posts	0 LindsD Hope you can still enjoy what's left of your holiday, LMH. And hope it's peaceful and painfree for him.
Little Miss Happy Oct 2023 12:42pm, 1 Oct 2023 6,678 posts	0 Little Miss Happy Thanks Linds. Nothing we can do that will make a difference.
EvilPixie Oct 2023 1:35pm, 1 Oct 2023 47,390 posts	0 EvilPixie Take care LMH

About This Thread

Maintained by LindsD

I thought I'd start a thread, as lots of us have elderly folks that we worry about/care for.

Useful info for after someone dies here (with thanks to grast_girl)
moneysavingexpert.com

Other useful links

myageingparent.com

moneysavingexpert.com

Who pays for residential care? Information here:

ageuk.org.uk

Advice on care homes and payment/funding

theguardian.com

Also: After someone dies, if their home insurance was only in their name, sadly the cover becomes void. But if the policy was in joint names, it will still cover the surviving policyholder (though the names on the policy will need to be updated).

A useful book of exercises for memory loss and dementia
amazon.co.uk

Pension Credit. The rules are a bit complex but if your elderly relative has some sort of disability (in this case dementia/Alzheimer's) and go into a home, they may be able to claim pension credit. So if carers allowance stops, it seems pension credit can start. It can also be backdated.

Fall alarm company, etc.

careium.co.uk

Useful Links

FE accepts no responsibility for external links. Or anything, really.

Alarm company

Related Threads

The Sandwich Generation - Aged Ps and children to care for? Jun 2023
Parental Health Concerns Apr 2021
They're growing up - support for parents Sep 2016
Support thread for parents of teenagers Sep 2024
Family Fun Question Mar 2016
Assisting teens in choosing university for 2021 during a pandemic Nov 2020
Fetchie Family Law Experts- I need you! Apr 2019
Activity holidays for families Feb 2016
Over 50's club Oct 2024
The Retirement Thread Oct 2024

age
family
support

Elderly parents or relatives to care for and/or worry about? This is the place for you.

About This Thread

Useful Links

Related Threads

Free training & racing tools for runners, cyclists, swimmers & walkers.