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Jun 2020
11:19am, 12 Jun 2020
23,300 posts
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Sushi.
I just up B&Q and asked ‘how big is the queue?’
They replied ‘It’s the same size as the B.’
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Jun 2020
3:03pm, 12 Jun 2020
19,372 posts
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DeeGee
Some episodes of "Fawlty Towers" are to be cancelled as they are considered outdated and no longer relevant to modern times.
The episodes affected are those that contain scenes of a thriving British hospitality industry.
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Jun 2020
3:04pm, 12 Jun 2020
43,078 posts
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Derby Tup
I thought they’d been cancelled because folk had finally realised the series is painfully unfunny
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Jun 2020
3:20pm, 12 Jun 2020
36,501 posts
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Nellers
(It's the "Don't mention the war" episode and despite what is being put around on FB etc it's due to use of the "N" word. BBC has been showing an edited version for years. Netflix etc have withdrawn temporarily to switch to an edited version too. It will be back, and as I understand it is still available from the BBC.)
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Jun 2020
3:32pm, 12 Jun 2020
43,079 posts
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Derby Tup
Quite right. Using the word ‘Nottingham’ is and always has been a sign of being morally bankrupt
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Jun 2020
5:51pm, 12 Jun 2020
4,135 posts
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Surrey Phil
For a few good laughs watching some classic comedy, how about a showing of Blazing Saddles tonight?
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Jun 2020
6:35pm, 12 Jun 2020
20,740 posts
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Nicholls595
I love Blazing Saddles
Last night we binge watched Max and Paddy. Very surprised to see Mrs Brown dressed as a man in episode 1.
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Jun 2020
7:13pm, 12 Jun 2020
82 posts
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wardi
A man has just been arrested for throwing Domestos at the Archbishop of Canterbury.
Police say he has been charged with a bleach of the priest.
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Jun 2020
9:10am, 13 Jun 2020
3,578 posts
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K5 Gus
Medical experts were asked if it is time to ease the lockdown.
Allergists were in favour of scratching it, but Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.
Gastroenterologists had sort of a gut feeling about it, but Neurologists thought the government had a lot of nerve.
Obstetricians felt certain everyone was labouring under a misconception, while Ophthalmologists considered the idea shortsighted.
Many Pathologists yelled, "Over my dead body!" while Paediatricians said, "Oh, grow up!"
Psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness, while Radiologists could see right through it.
Surgeons decided to wash their hands of the whole thing and pharmacists claimed it would be a bitter pill to swallow.
Plastic Surgeons opined that this proposal would "put a whole new face on the matter."
Podiatrists thought it was a step forward, but Urologists were pissed off at the whole idea.
Anaesthetists thought the whole idea was gas, and those lofty Cardiologists didn’t have the heart to say no.
In the end, the Proctologists won out, leaving the entire decision up to the assholes.
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Jun 2020
9:12pm, 13 Jun 2020
498 posts
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colindglen
Stop buying pre-shredded cheese. Make Britain grate again. 🇬🇧
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Mundane Joke Thread
Nov 2021