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Joke of the day........

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swittle Mar 2018 1:13pm, 20 Mar 2018 47,821 posts	Quote Pin swittle Love ^
Sigh Mar 2018 7:35pm, 20 Mar 2018 1,463 posts	Quote Pin Sigh I got a phone call today asking if I'd ever had PPI. "No," I said, "but I've had conjunctivitis, does that count?"
Jock Itch Mar 2018 7:38am, 21 Mar 2018 12,396 posts	Quote Pin Jock Itch Interviewer: “What do you consider one of your best strengths?” Me: “I can perform under pressure.” Interviewer: “That’s fantastic! Can you give me an example?” Me: “Sure. (clears throat..) .. mm ba ba de Um bum ba de Um bu bu bum da de Prrressure pushing down on me..”
Markymarkmark Mar 2018 8:37am, 21 Mar 2018 6,698 posts	Quote Pin Markymarkmark [Stolen already, Jock. :-)]
richmac Mar 2018 1:07pm, 22 Mar 2018 11,195 posts	Quote Pin richmac Suddenly the show 'I'm a celebrity get me out of here' has a new meaning
Iron Thigh Girl Mar 2018 8:35am, 23 Mar 2018 5,327 posts	Quote Pin Iron Thigh Girl Brexiteers are championing the new British passports. To be delivered in French navy.
Jock Itch Mar 2018 11:02am, 26 Mar 2018 12,399 posts	Quote Pin Jock Itch Just bought some 007 Viagra... Apparently it makes you Roger more!
DavieO. Mar 2018 10:20pm, 27 Mar 2018 106 posts	Quote Pin DavieO. My wife asked me for a pet spider for her birthday, so I went to our local pet shop and they were £70!!! So I thought, I can get one cheaper off the web.
Stander Mar 2018 6:48am, 28 Mar 2018 15,659 posts	Quote Pin Stander If a woman ever pulls a knife in you, the best defence is too whip out two slices of bread. Then her womanly instincts will kick in and she’ll make you a sandwich.
Stander Mar 2018 6:48am, 28 Mar 2018 15,660 posts	Quote Pin Stander On you. Not in you. So wish Fetch had an error facility.