for an ad-free Fetcheveryone experience!

Joke of the day........

1 lurker | 506 watchers

daz1927 Aug 2020 1:18pm, 24 Aug 2020 5,864 posts	Quote Pin daz1927 There's a new sign at the railway station saying 'do not stand close to the edge of the platform or you will get sucked off' Four fcuking hours wasted.
daz1927 Aug 2020 1:20pm, 24 Aug 2020 5,865 posts	Quote Pin daz1927 6 months until pancake day and they've already got flour and eggs in the shops!
Stander Aug 2020 3:46pm, 26 Aug 2020 102 posts	Quote Pin Stander As I came out our local co-op, a bloke asked me what the quickest way to London is. I said are you walking or driving. He said driving. I said, yes, that is the quickest way.
GordonG Aug 2020 4:01pm, 26 Aug 2020 8,287 posts	Quote Pin GordonG [though once he gets to London, it won't be!]
57.5 Degrees of Pain Aug 2020 3:58pm, 27 Aug 2020 6,141 posts	Quote Pin 57.5 Degrees of Pain SELLING ADULT TOYS 🙈 I'm proud to announce that I am selling Adult Toys. I hope no one is embarrassed to ask for them. I have all kinds, sizes and styles according to your needs. Discretion is guaranteed!! Fmail me if you have any questions. Fantastic range, I have everything listed below...... Zimmer frames, wheelchairs, oxygen tanks, walking stick/canes, disposable diapers, catheters, etc etc.
Brunski Aug 2020 2:36pm, 28 Aug 2020 1,718 posts	Quote Pin Brunski I've been trying to organise a Hide and Seek tournament for a while, but it is not easy... Good players are hard to find!
McGoohan Aug 2020 3:06pm, 28 Aug 2020 46,687 posts	Quote Pin McGoohan My son asked, "Dad, what are condoms for?" "Usually to avoid answering questions like these," I replied.
McGoohan Aug 2020 3:07pm, 28 Aug 2020 46,688 posts	Quote Pin McGoohan Yesterday, I was washing the car with my son. He said, "Dad can't you just use a sponge?"
McGoohan Aug 2020 3:07pm, 28 Aug 2020 46,689 posts	Quote Pin McGoohan I tried to read a book today on the history of Sellotape, but I couldn't find the beginning
McGoohan Aug 2020 3:08pm, 28 Aug 2020 46,690 posts	Quote Pin McGoohan I saw a sign in a shop window that said, 'Watch batteries fitted £2.50.' I thought, "Why would anyone pay to see that?"