Elderly parents or relatives to care for and/or worry about? This is the place for you.

5 lurkers | 140 watchers
4 Mar
5:37pm, 4 Mar 2024
6,983 posts
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Little Miss Happy
Sorry for your loss TR.
4 Mar
5:50pm, 4 Mar 2024
52,294 posts
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EvilPixie
So sorry TR
Love to you and the family
So glad she got to say she loved you
4 Mar
7:29pm, 4 Mar 2024
26,414 posts
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Bazoaxe
TR. I am so sorry to hear of your loss
4 Mar
7:34pm, 4 Mar 2024
18,488 posts
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Mandymoo
So sorry TR for yours and your families loss. Sounds like your mum was surrounded with love xx
4 Mar
7:49pm, 4 Mar 2024
53,828 posts
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McGoohan
Sorry for your loss TR. Your family gave her the best end anyone could hope for: being close to people you love and who love you.
4 Mar
9:38pm, 4 Mar 2024
12,437 posts
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leaguefreak
Sorry for your loss TR
4 Mar
10:31pm, 4 Mar 2024
7,333 posts
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ThorntonRunner
Thank you everybody. Your thoughts are much appreciated heart
It's been a strange day. After mum died at 10:30, doctor came at 12:30 so then I was able to phone the undertakers. Mum had a funeral plan so that was straightforward. The undertakers came at 3:30.

Sister took an hour out to tell my elder nephew (both nephews are on the autistic spectrum and elder needs careful handling with an event like this - all good though. He went for a walk on his own to start processing it and his brother stayed home to be there when he returned whilst my sister rejoined us at mum's).
So a lot of sitting around where we could think about admin etc to come, but not actually do or plan anything concrete. That will come soon enough.
Whilst we are sad, we are also relieved that it was a rapid decline and end, and that mum didn't suffer for an extended time. The fact that it was a life completed rather than a life cut short makes it easier, and we were blessed that apart from my eldest who lives in Cumbria all the close family had time with mum in the final 48 hours. Whilst it would have been nice for her to make her century in June, the price for her in discomfort and pain would not have been worth it.

We are very blessed.
4 Mar
10:44pm, 4 Mar 2024
40,949 posts
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Mrs Jigs (Luverlylegs)
My condolences ThorntonRunner, so good that family were present in your Mum’s final days as were able, comforting for you all that she had a peaceful passing without drama.
4 Mar
11:33pm, 4 Mar 2024
32,238 posts
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macca 53
Sorry for your loss TR
5 Mar
8:05am, 5 Mar 2024
3,067 posts
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Grast_girl
My condolences TR. Blessed indeed to have a little time, but not suffer too much.

About This Thread

Maintained by LindsD
I thought I'd start a thread, as lots of us have elderly folks that we worry about/care for.

Useful info for after someone dies here (with thanks to grast_girl)
moneysavingexpert.com

Other useful links

myageingparent.com

moneysavingexpert.com

Who pays for residential care? Information here:

ageuk.org.uk

Advice on care homes and payment/funding

theguardian.com

Also: After someone dies, if their home insurance was only in their name, sadly the cover becomes void. But if the policy was in joint names, it will still cover the surviving policyholder (though the names on the policy will need to be updated).

A useful book of exercises for memory loss and dementia
amazon.co.uk

Pension Credit. The rules are a bit complex but if your elderly relative has some sort of disability (in this case dementia/Alzheimer's) and go into a home, they may be able to claim pension credit. So if carers allowance stops, it seems pension credit can start. It can also be backdated.

Fall alarm company, etc.

careium.co.uk

Useful Links

FE accepts no responsibility for external links. Or anything, really.

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