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May 2021
9:35pm, 26 May 2021
21,230 posts
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Rosehip
Does the phone have a block caller option that's been accidentally used?
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May 2021
9:36pm, 26 May 2021
51,719 posts
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Lip Gloss
That sounds plausible RH cause it’s very strange others can through
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May 2021
9:44pm, 26 May 2021
19,866 posts
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Bazoaxe
I had wondered that until the carers said they can call. We need to go round and phone the phone company while there and see what they say.
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May 2021
9:49pm, 26 May 2021
5,741 posts
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Fizz :-)
It’s not very likely, but is there any chance you’re not dialling the right number? Your MIL got it changed somehow?
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May 2021
11:08pm, 26 May 2021
10,222 posts
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jda
We once had a very odd fault with a phone that only called one way (can’t remember which). Turned out to be faulty/corroded junction somewhere outside the house.
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May 2021
6:14am, 27 May 2021
4,571 posts
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Little Miss Happy
I hope you can get it sorted Baz - one more thing you don't need to have to be dealing with. 
Sounds positive about the handyman jda.
Glad you were able to get through CK2.
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May 2021
8:35am, 27 May 2021
920 posts
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Big_G
I have a feeling I may be visiting this thread more regularly.
Dad’s back in hospital as his foot is infected again (he had all the toes off of one foot about a month ago), which is really frustrating as he was doing quite well, but took a step backwards over the last weekend Don’t know how long he’s going to be in for, but when he comes home he’ll be back to square one so it feels like the last 2-3 weeks at home have been for nothing. His partner (76, they don’t live together but she lives across the road) is frazzled and I am too really, as the last few days in particular have been very tough. We need more help/care, which he’ll have to start paying for, but so far he doesn’t want anyone else in the house, so I’m stuck. Any advice on how to overcome this would be much appreciated!
I need to keep chipping away at him, which is stressful in itself! I have ordered a pendant/fall alarm system, which is being installed today. I think one way forward may be to get a key box, and get ‘roaming night care’, but again he doesn’t want anyone in the house so it’s all incredibly frustrating. He keeps on saying ‘I hope you don’t get like this when you’re old, as then you’ll understand why I don’t want the help’. I don’t get that argument really, but I’m trying to stay calm and not react too much, but it's like banging my head against a brick wall. One the one hand he says "Don't worry about me, go and live your life" (how can I not worry!?), but then on the other hand he doesn't let me just sort stuff out for him. I do have his best interests at heart and I know he knows that, but....well, it's a big fight.
Trying to spin any positive, the fact he’s back in hospital hopefully means I can crack on with a flat I’ve been doing up, as progress has been very intermittent the last 2 or 3 weeks, as I’ve been over Dad’s quite a lot. If I had a ‘normal’ job or lived away like I used to, I really don’t know how we'd have got on, so hats off to all of you who juggle this with normal life. His partner has been doing the bulk of it really, but I suppose I've been doing all the organising of various things, plus visiting a lot of the time during the days to do what I can (making meals, drinks, shopping etc etc), and just trying to get through to him that we need more help. I was hoping in 4-6 weeks we'd have some kind of normality after his operation as he was doing okay but obviously I was wrong, and as I say it'll be back to square one when he gets home. Really it'll worse than back to square one as the small amount of NHS-funded home care will be stopping.
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May 2021
8:53am, 27 May 2021
4,572 posts
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Little Miss Happy
Sorry to hear that your dad is back in hospital Big_G. I feel your frustration and I think it's something most of us have/are dealing with. The best advice I can give is to try to get him to talk about why he doesn't want anyone in the house - but I suspect you'll really need to pin him down and ask him direct questions.
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May 2021
8:56am, 27 May 2021
19,868 posts
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Bazoaxe
Big g - that all sounds very difficult and familiar and it seems the elderly largely dont want to accept they need help and soldier on thinking thats easiest for everyone and dont see the impact it has. I do see that it must be frustrating when you cant do what you used to and then rely on others and you want to do your best to protect them. It sounds like you are doing all of the right things and as you say just keep chipping away.
MiLs phone issue is resolved. She has been on the hone twice this morning and Mrs Axe has succesfully called back. One of MiLs friends succesfully called her last night also. Its not clear what was wrong and why we couldnt get through on multiple devices but others could. Having dialled the wrong number went through my mind but we tried repeatedly and checked what we were dialling. MiL said something about the phone being caught behind her chair which doesnt make sense as the phone cable doesnt run behind her chair.
The carers have reported MiL is depressed and suggested we take her out. What they dont realise is that its a military operation to do so and also MiL will fight any attempts tooth an nail. She would grudge paying money for a coffee despite being very comfortable financially. We could go for a walk, but of course she cannot really walk well and refuses to contemplate a wheelchair.
Mrs Axe is there tomorrow and will suggest she comes down to sit in our garden for a few hours on Sunday as the weather is forecast to be nice. Lets see how that lands.
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May 2021
11:28am, 27 May 2021
47,289 posts
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LindsD
Big_G and Baz, that sounds very frustrating and difficult for both of you.
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