Meaningless product descriptions

2 lurkers | 123 watchers
Apr 2011
3:24pm, 20 Apr 2011
6,398 posts
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Slowboy
"The chromed fibres of our FACT carbon outsole act as a heat shield, reflecting road heat even in the hottest riding conditions "

Oh good, no more burned feet due to 'reflected road heat'!
Apr 2011
3:37pm, 20 Apr 2011
45,656 posts
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GregP
That's a relief then :)
Apr 2011
3:40pm, 20 Apr 2011
5,496 posts
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ChrisHB
I'd like to see these creative marketing types interviewed at great length by a sympathetic interviewer so they reveal exactly what (if anything) they were thinking at the time. Afterwards in a second interview they could be savaged by J Paxman.
May 2011
9:59am, 6 May 2011
16,812 posts
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Nellers
"The 20 years research by The Maperton Trust, which is concerned with the holistic approach to health, has produced another winner to help people with a difficult health problem.

The Head Lice Repelling Unit (HELRU) is a small device using the latest technology to repel head lice from infesting children and adults. It is in the form of a badge of the Unicorn and is pinned to the clothing of the individual.

It is designed to be completely safe to the wearer. Its effect on head lice is to repel them. "

I shit you not.
May 2011
10:02am, 6 May 2011
16,813 posts
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Nellers
Oh, and they cost about £20 each!
May 2011
10:10am, 6 May 2011
2,053 posts
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GlennR
Couldn't resist tracking that one down Nellers:

mapertontrust.com

A thing of considerable beauty... :-)
May 2011
10:13am, 6 May 2011
16,814 posts
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Nellers
My daughter has a little badge making machine and some felt tips. If anyone wants a unicorn badge I think she could knock them out for about £2.
May 2011
11:11am, 6 May 2011
16,818 posts
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Nellers
It is the gift that keeps on giving! From the "FAQ page:

1. How does it work?
Without a comprehensive understanding of technology e.g. that used in space travel, it is not really possible to provide a very satisfactory answer.
May 2011
11:35am, 6 May 2011
5,621 posts
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ChrisHB
I'd settle for a satisfactory answer. It needn't be "very" satisfactory. Anyway, space travel (aka rocket science) is mostly Newton's laws of motion.
May 2011
11:40am, 6 May 2011
16,819 posts
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Nellers
Not if you're a Bicoolawakezibilon, Chris, and I suspect they are suggesting something other-wordly rather than invoking NASA.

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Maintained by GregP

(header last updated 07/01/24)

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