I've just posted again. Previously v'rap had said something completely different regarding cisgender, now she's saying its offensive, and Roo has previously used male and men interchangeably. I just want everyone to be like my child when they said they want to be a 'kind human person' when they grow up.
I was annoyed with the transphobia on this website before and later stupidly clicked on featured blog posts that were even worse.
Trying to remember that actually there's popular support for trans people in the UK, and it's possible for that to become a much larger majority very quickly.
FYI, for today who didn't already know, you can mute a whole thread, so you don't see it on the forum home page and aren't tempted to check in and see if what's happening in it.
The option is up there in the yellow links under the thread title
I wouldn't know where to start with the other thread. I'd say I'm supportive of trans rights, but open to sensible/sensitive discussion of the few situations where I can see rights may clash and solutions need to be found, however things tend to get very polarised very quickly (especially on twitter).
We've got a combination of toilet situations at work. Old ones that have been "converted" to mixed sex by changing the sign on the door. Those don't have floor to ceiling doors/cubicles, but I still use them without a thought. We also have brand new ones that are individual rooms for the toilets themselves and then mixed for hand washing etc. All showers I'm aware of are individual rooms. I think this is the future we should all be striving for, privacy for all, especially in school where communal open-plan changing rooms are just a breeding ground for bullying.
I've had multiple complaints about the recent activity on both the trans threads. I will post the same message on both.
It seems that we've reached a point where the ability to discuss these issues has broken down.
I have always fought hard for free speech on Fetcheveryone; but always on the understanding that this freedom comes with a responsibility to consider the things that you say, and their impact on others.
You all have the right to your opinions, but I ask you to think about your goals. I figure that any debate should exist to gain a greater understanding of the issue at hand; and to see if differing views can be at least partially reconciled, in order for our world to progress. I don't believe that this is possible without collaboration and respect, and it concerns me that there's not a lot of evidence of either just now.
If we are ever to find a way forward in a very difficult situation, it has to be with everyone taking a seat at the table. As someone who is neither trans nor female, I would not assume I have the right to speak for you nor to understand your issues as fully as you do. But I imagine that any reasonable viewer of this thread, myself included, has a huge amount of sympathy for all the individuals the issue affects.
I don't have a solution that looks after everyone. But I know that the solution must do so. If you can please keep that in mind, we can all be a part of this.
Hands up who is surprised that the transphobes are complaining about the people they want to oppress receiving support (on the dedicated support thread, of all places. the horror!)
Actually I have read a few pages of this thread and not seen any opposition to anyone receiving support to be who ever they want to be. Prehaps you could post a link
To clarify, there have been complaints about multiple people with different viewpoints. I have posted it on both threads to give everyone the opportunity to read it.
A thread about how we can encourage and include people in whatever exercise they are interested in and removing barriers to participation.
Glossary -------------------- Amendments/Corrections/Requests just ask for a sidebar edit. This is NOT comprehensive, just some helpful shorthand. ---------------------
Gender Identity ≠ Gender Expression ≠ Anatomical Sex ≠ Sexual Orientation
Anatomical sex = The physical aspects that make you fit into a category based on genitals, chromosomes etc i.e. Intersex, Female, Male... Gender identity = The internal view of gender, the way you see yourself. Gender expression = The way you present to others externally through clothing, behaviours, language and other social signals.
Sexual orientation = Who you are attracted to.
None of the above are dependent on any of the others, individuals may relate one to another in their specific case, but assuming what one might be based on observation of another is not a sound basis for determination.
Transgender (Trans) = When your gender identity does not match your identity assigned at birth based on anatomical sex. Cisgender (Cis) = When your gender identity matches your identity assigned at birth based on anatomical sex. Non Binary (Enby) = When your gender identity doesn't fall into either of the female/male choice. It may exist somewhere on the spectrum between woman and man, either stable of fluctuating between woman-ness and man-ness. This may encapsulate those that may use terms such as genderfluid, agender, demigender et al.
Pronouns = she/her, him/his, them/they etc... How to refer best to someone else. Really simply, follow their lead. Ask if unsure, be polite. If corrected, it's not a problem unless you repeatedly ignore correction.
Transition = The process somebody goes through to alter their physical attributes to better match their gender identity and expression.
Dysphoria = The distress a person feels due to a mismatch between their gender identity and their sex assigned at birth. Can fluctuate and be experienced at varying degrees. Dysmorphia = Discomfort with the shape/form of the body. Present in eating disorders and the like, but can often effect transgender people, with triggers such as body hair presence/absence, chest/genital presentation etc. Deadname - The name a person is assigned at birth, that they no longer use.
Triggers = Things that are known to cause an effect. Typically, X causes a person to experience dysphoria/dysmorphia. Sometimes these can be managed/avoided, other times they are inevitable.
Acronyms: amab = assigned male at birth (originally born anatomically male)
afab = assigned female at birth (originally born anatomically female)
ftm = female to male transitioner mtf = male to female transitioner egg = state of somebody before becoming aware they were transgender i.e. "their egg cracked when they realised and began to emerge" GIC/GIS = Gender Identity Clinic/Service, providing transition services GRS = Gender Reassignment Surgery
General notes: * Not everyone will be comfortable talking about their situation, depending on where they are. * Not everyone has the language to articulate how they feel, what they want to say. Be patient. * These things are NOT static, what you encounter in a person today may evolve into something else later. * Am I trans/cis/enby etc... Frankly, you tell us. Whatever YOU are comfortable with at the time is what we will adopt. It is YOUR identity. * This language is weird. Yup, and we (CreatureOfTheHill) as a plural system talk strange too, it's OK. We (CreatureOfTheHill) are not "normal", never have been. * Am I weird/abnormal? Possibly, but it has NOTHING to do with being here or being trans/enby or whatever. People just are in general, and that is OK, we love you for your quirkiness.
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Gender identity, please help change
Jun 2021
