Liar, liar, pants on fire

1 lurker | 18 watchers
Velociraptor
Velociraptor
18 Jan
3:50pm, 18 Jan 2024
67,379 posts
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Velociraptor
I have to take my own coffee wherever I go because I've become violently allergic to all coffee beans that haven't been passed through the intestinal tract of a small mammal. This isn't usually a problem when I go to people's houses, but I've got legal cases against several major coffee chains because the staff refuse to scrub and decontaminate their coffee machines in order to make me a flat white that won't kill me. It's not as if I'm even asking them to buy in the beans, I'm willing to provide them.
Derby Tup
Derby Tup
18 Jan
3:53pm, 18 Jan 2024
63,827 posts
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Derby Tup
I steer clear of caffeinated drinks and stick mainly to swimming pool water with vitamin pills
Nicholls595
Nicholls595
18 Jan
4:01pm, 18 Jan 2024
31,416 posts
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Nicholls595
I only drink tramp's urine. With a slice of lime.
Nicholls595
Nicholls595
18 Jan
4:03pm, 18 Jan 2024
31,417 posts
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Nicholls595
My usual supplier is a 64 year old Scotsman called Kenny. He goes everywhere with me (I push him in a wheel barrow) in case I get thirsty.
HappyG(rrr)
HappyG(rrr)
18 Jan
4:06pm, 18 Jan 2024
49,202 posts
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HappyG(rrr)
I have to take my own coffee wherever I go because I've become violently allergic to all coffee beans that haven't been passed through the intestinal tract of a small mammal. This isn't usually a problem when I go to people's houses, but I've got legal cases against several major coffee chains because the staff refuse to scrub and decontaminate their coffee machines in order to make me a flat white that won't kill me. It's not as if I'm even asking them to buy in the beans, I'm willing to provide them.


Is that really a lie V'rap?! :-P :-) G
McGoohan
McGoohan
18 Jan
4:09pm, 18 Jan 2024
53,612 posts
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McGoohan
I only drink tramp's urine. With a slice of lime.


Fosters?
Derby Tup
Derby Tup
18 Jan
4:14pm, 18 Jan 2024
63,831 posts
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Derby Tup
:-)
Velociraptor
Velociraptor
18 Jan
4:14pm, 18 Jan 2024
67,383 posts
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Velociraptor
Of course it's not, :) G. I NEVER tell lies. NEVER.
Nicholls595
Nicholls595
18 Jan
4:16pm, 18 Jan 2024
31,418 posts
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Nicholls595
I only drink tramp's urine. With a slice of lime. Fosters?


Yes. My tramp is called Kenny Foster
57.5 Days of Pain
57.5 Days of Pain
18 Jan
4:26pm, 18 Jan 2024
16,454 posts
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57.5 Days of Pain
I have to take my own coffee wherever I go because I've become violently allergic to all coffee beans that haven't been passed through the intestinal tract of a small mammal. This isn't usually a problem when I go to people's houses, but I've got legal cases against several major coffee chains because the staff refuse to scrub and decontaminate their coffee machines in order to make me a flat white that won't kill me. It's not as if I'm even asking them to buy in the beans, I'm willing to provide them.
Do you bring already 'processed' beans Velociraptor, or do you transport your small mammal and carry out the processing with the coffee house's beans on the premises? Asking for a friend.

About This Thread

Maintained by Derby Tup
Inspired by mention of superliars on Velociraptor's blog I thought I'd start a thread where Fetchies could post lies. Make them big fat ones please

For starters I've been seriously considering a hair transplant

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