Sep 2021
10:02pm, 21 Sep 2021
13,567 posts
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Jock Itch
Sadly, the guy who invented the fruit smoothie has passed away.
He's being berried on Friday.
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Sep 2021
6:03pm, 23 Sep 2021
10,240 posts
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Sigh
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Sep 2021
6:24pm, 23 Sep 2021
2,624 posts
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JRitchie
I fell down the stairs at Gatwick today and had to go to hospital for an X-Ray.
I'm fine though it was only an airline fracture.
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Sep 2021
8:24pm, 23 Sep 2021
6,030 posts
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daz1927
I looked up an old girlfriend from school earlier.
Being a Gynaecologist has it's perks....
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Sep 2021
8:26pm, 23 Sep 2021
6,031 posts
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daz1927
I am currently on a week long sexual harassment course...
Only one day in and I think I am going to be fucking good at it....
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Sep 2021
8:28pm, 23 Sep 2021
6,032 posts
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daz1927
You know you're getting too old for the job's market when you forward a CV to a company, and they send you a free Parker Pen just for applying.
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Sep 2021
8:30pm, 23 Sep 2021
6,033 posts
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daz1927
Always buy more alcohol than you think you will need.
Better to be safe than sober...
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Sep 2021
8:31pm, 23 Sep 2021
6,034 posts
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daz1927
Masturbation is a touchy subject, whereas Oral sex is a matter of taste...
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Sep 2021
8:33pm, 23 Sep 2021
6,035 posts
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daz1927
I was lying in bed with my blonde girlfriend last night when she said, "I think my boobs are too small, I'm going to get a boob job."
"Hmm," I replied, "my hands are too small... what do you think I should do?"
"Do you want a hand job?"
She's a keeper...
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Sep 2021
8:39pm, 23 Sep 2021
6,036 posts
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daz1927
I went to see a Physcic last night, I said to her, "Before I pay you, prove your abilities or I'm leaving."
She looked deep into my eyes and said, "You masturbate a lot!"
I said, "Fucking hell! That's brilliant, but how do you know?"
She said, "Wedding ring."
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