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Jan 2022
9:11am, 25 Jan 2022
84,849 posts
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Hanneke
Morning all!
Welcome VD and FS xx
So yesterday I went to my client and set up at the top part of the garden, which I access from there, away from the house and continued where I left off 2 weeks ago: cleaning the greenhouse!
Then I needed buckets of water from the house so I dragged myself down. Client was clearing dog poo, he has three gorgeous Springers.
This was good: the dogs adore me and I love them. This always mellows him. I asked for water: him go ahead! So I then hauled myself up in yhe greenhouse, blocking the entrance with the ladder, so no confrontations possible. I managed 4 hours work...
I know avoidance tactic isn't ideal but shall be employed until I have found a solution, i.e. found another new client...
Around here, that isn't that easy... So having found one the same week I lost one is good going!
I am off to yoga in a moment, followed by coffee as my teacher is a dear friend. Tuesdays are always good days!
Om Prem everyone.
P.S. Prem is love in Sanskrit
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Jan 2022
9:39am, 25 Jan 2022
41,150 posts
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HappyG(rrr)
FS, that sounds really tough.
I had two run ins with a colleague who I have to work directly with, every day or two. A complete shouting, swearing, aggressive scream at me, that I was disrespecting him and undermining every thing he was doing. One of them was with 2 other colleagues (it was online over Teams, not in an office). While it was very embarrassing, I was glad that two colleagues were on the call in one instance when it happened, so I had witnesses. The same thing happened in another call just the two of us.
Fortunately the company were very good about it and I was contacted by his manager asking if I wanted to raise a formal complaint (one of the colleagues must have mentioned it to her). I said no, let me talk to him about it. We had a chat the next morning and he was very apologetic, numerous health issues, his wife is also unwell, basically, under a lot of stress. We've got on fine ever since, but it really shook me up at the time.
My son and his partner have to go to a funeral tomorrow - her uncle committed suicide (40s with teenage kids) last week. Well drug overdose / suicide. Tragic. Second suicide in the extended family.
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Jan 2022
12:18pm, 25 Jan 2022
8,926 posts
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The Terminator
Glad it went well as possible yesterday H. May Tuesday be everything you hope for and more.
It's good to be able to approach situations such as work conflict with the mindset of trying to understand the reasons behind their behaviour or, even better, talk to them about it and/or change the behaviour they expect from you. This is really my Buddhist practice and study talking and I must stress that although maybe the approaches may be for the best are actually very hard to instigate. I have read and heard so many examples, like HG's, where such relationships have been transformed entirely. I am struggling to connect with any of the Buddhist philosophy right now and although practicing still it is with very little belief.
In all things are really weird. I'm functioning but not functioning at exactly the same time. I go from thinking I'm broken beyond repair, mostly existential regards the things I touched on yesterday, but also in the way I have lived and treated myself and loved ones for the last 49 years, to walking round in circles in town, to having fully coherent, even upbeat, thoughts and conversations about the world and my future within the space of minutes.
Now I've been prescribed sleeping tablets and AD and am still completely torn.
Hey VD and FS keep checking in and sharing. I find I feel safe when posting here and reading people's experiences and thoughts.
All the best for today everyone x
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Jan 2022
12:46pm, 25 Jan 2022
2,194 posts
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Fields
I’m glad it went well Hanneke. Your day sounds nice.
Welcome to Fresh Start. It’s a shame your colleagues are like that. You won’t achieve your shared work goals if you don’t work together and support each other. It doesn’t sound like a good environment - my brother had a similar problem at a previous job where it was felt someone else “deserved” got the job. Thankfully I’ve found a supportive and forgiving work environment and I’d happily stay here until retirement if I can.
I’ve arranged to volunteer at my local parkrun, it’s all sorted for a few weeks time. I’m looking forward to it but then immediately felt self-doubt nagging away at me as I don’t look like a runner anymore, and am a big fat mess. I did explain my current physical limits and the lady who emailed did say I wasn’t the only volunteer who couldn’t run due to injury, so I feel a bit better.
Hopefully this will help to get me out of the house a bit and lead to some social connections in this area. I don’t mind not knowing people locally, I don’t sit at home feeling sad and alone, but I recognise that I shouldn’t get into a rut. One positive of being in my 40s is I’m quite good at knowing myself now.
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Jan 2022
12:47pm, 25 Jan 2022
84,854 posts
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Hanneke
TT, stop see Buddhism as a believe. Start seeing it as a way of life, something you practice. Where the body goes, mindfulness follows more easily.
I don't sit at all right now, apart from once every other week, at the end of my Taichi class.
It doesn't matter! Buddhism is a way of life, of being. Not a belief system.
You are the Buddha, so light some incense, a candle, for YOU!
And practice compassion for yourself first and foremost and for all beings!
May all beings be happy and free from fear xx
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Jan 2022
1:31pm, 25 Jan 2022
8,927 posts
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The Terminator
Thanks Hanneke. Yes I agree with all you're saying and have long lived by such principles, even before I started actually studying or practicing. Poor choice of words perhaps. I have very little faith. It is hard. I know what Nichiren said about the difficulties of keeping faith and the importance of practice in the harder times but here I am.
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Jan 2022
1:48pm, 25 Jan 2022
84,868 posts
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Hanneke
Compassion for yourself TT xx
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Jan 2022
1:55pm, 25 Jan 2022
8,928 posts
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The Terminator
I'm trying. Thanks 🙏 x
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Jan 2022
2:01pm, 25 Jan 2022
84,874 posts
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Hanneke
Some left over here, winging its way to you 😘🙏
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Jan 2022
2:34pm, 25 Jan 2022
36,671 posts
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halfpint
Feeling anxious about a thing over which I have no control. Ironically it is linked with a friend’s poor mental health. They have a tendency to blow hot and cold (depending on their state of mind) and even though I know it’s not about me I struggle to not stress about the uncertainty of their communication. I’m not very good with uncertainty and unpredictability.
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depression
Aug 2024