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Elderly parents or relatives to care for and/or worry about? This is the place for you.

7 lurkers | 148 watchers
Hibeedeb
Hibeedeb
6 Feb
12:04pm, 6 Feb 2025
3,400 posts
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Hibeedeb
Sad for your mum LindsD. My parents now live in a retirement residence, and at nearly 92 and 88 they lose friends regularly. It must be very hard.
PaulaMc
PaulaMc
6 Feb
12:47pm, 6 Feb 2025
13,148 posts
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PaulaMc
Dad is back in hospital. Apparently the district nurse took one look at his foot yesterday and decided it was Not Good and called an ambulance. He’s scheduled to have an MRI tomorrow and, possibly, surgery?

Current plan is for me and C to go to his flat on Saturday afternoon to see what needs doing. The carers do a basic clean/hoover every now and then so it shouldn’t be too awful, it’s mostly going to involve removing any remaining clothing and taking it to the tip, then replacing with new. We’ve done this before. No doubt we’ll do it again. The bedding should be ok because he sleeps on the sofa - I don’t think he actually goes into the bedroom at all.
LindsD
LindsD
6 Feb
1:08pm, 6 Feb 2025
72,508 posts
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LindsD
Oh blimey. Good luck with all of that.
CK2
CK2
6 Feb
1:11pm, 6 Feb 2025
2,885 posts
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CK2
That sounds challenging Paula - I hope it goes ok.
My mum is in her mid 80s and she and her friends regularly talk about death and continually say ‘if I’m still here then’. I guess it’s facing the reality of losing people regularly and knowing they’re at the end of their lives.
Little Miss Happy
Little Miss Happy
6 Feb
1:58pm, 6 Feb 2025
7,861 posts
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Little Miss Happy
Unfortunately yes Linds.

Sorry to hear that Paula.
TeeBee
TeeBee
6 Feb
7:53pm, 6 Feb 2025
10,664 posts
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TeeBee
Sending hugs to everyone who needs them today
McGoohan
McGoohan
6 Feb
8:01pm, 6 Feb 2025
55,023 posts
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McGoohan
Non-blog update from me for a change: FiL is going to move into the care home ... tomorrow afternoon
ThorntonRunner
ThorntonRunner
6 Feb
8:07pm, 6 Feb 2025
8,132 posts
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ThorntonRunner
Fingers crossed it all goes well for him McG - it has the potential to make your lives so much easier
LipGloss
LipGloss
6 Feb
8:09pm, 6 Feb 2025
79,942 posts
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LipGloss
Oh such good news. Hopefully it gives you peace of mind. Did MiL like what she saw today?
McGoohan
McGoohan
6 Feb
8:15pm, 6 Feb 2025
55,024 posts
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McGoohan
She did - the room is South facing over the gardens and it was really sunny and light. We're very relieved

About This Thread

Maintained by LindsD
I thought I'd start a thread, as lots of us have elderly folks that we worry about/care for.

Useful info for after someone dies here (with thanks to grast_girl)
moneysavingexpert.com

Other useful links

myageingparent.com

moneysavingexpert.com

Who pays for residential care? Information here:

ageuk.org.uk

Advice on care homes and payment/funding

theguardian.com

Also: After someone dies, if their home insurance was only in their name, sadly the cover becomes void. But if the policy was in joint names, it will still cover the surviving policyholder (though the names on the policy will need to be updated).

A useful book of exercises for memory loss and dementia
amazon.co.uk

Pension Credit. The rules are a bit complex but if your elderly relative has some sort of disability (in this case dementia/Alzheimer's) and go into a home, they may be able to claim pension credit. So if carers allowance stops, it seems pension credit can start. It can also be backdated.

Fall alarm company, etc.

careium.co.uk
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Useful Links

FE accepts no responsibility for external links. Or anything, really.

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