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May 2013
9:41am, 13 May 2013
12,241 posts
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Discovery Dave
*Deep breath*
XH has arranged GP appointment today with a view to starting the diagnostic process.
I have no desire to be antagonistic, or to block this if it's the best thing, but it's like she's already made up her mind. "I've been saying he might be autistic since he was two", she just said to me.
And school are saying unhelpful things like "he finds it difficult to cope with change". Does he bollocks. Swapped beds with his sister last week for the hell of it. Always asking for a new/different breakfast cereal. Boasting yesterday about how many kinds of fish he likes to eat now. Asked me the other day if he could try chilli sauce.
I feel a bit like everyone is looking for opportunities to tick boxes to make him fit into a diagnosis that would suit them. Yes, he drives my XH up the wall. But he's a lot like me. And she's my *ex*. You do the maths.
Is it wrong of me to feel like nobody "gets" him like I do? He's at least 20 IQ points ahead of anyone else he knows. That's hard to cope with, and yes he's going to hurt people's feelings sometimes. Sometimes he will be spiteful. Sometimes he will be naughty. Often he's extremely stubborn. None of that makes him autistic.
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May 2013
9:42am, 13 May 2013
12,242 posts
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Discovery Dave
(I'm not saying I'm 20 IQ points ahead of everyone else I know. But at primary school? Pretty much.)
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May 2013
9:44am, 13 May 2013
6,610 posts
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Chicken Licken
I agree re the violence V'rap - I was not having any of that! He's a huge lad and could of easily killed someone.
Big bird- hates clothes. He wears very baggy trs - he takes duvet covers off his bed some nights. However he likes snuggly things like flannelette! So I've tracked down some almost furry type bedding!
Food is still a big thing - but we are making some progress as he will now eat a pizza ( two things touching aaaah) sometimes 3 or 4 now.
FR - sorry I did chuckle a little bit and her telling him off!
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May 2013
9:47am, 13 May 2013
5,435 posts
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*Anj*
Dave, will you be present at the Drs appointment? I hope you get a chance to say all the things you have said above about his behavior when he is with you.
I don't have any experience of autism so not really sure I can add anything other than, whoever deals with his assessment should hear all sides and how he is when with you, with XH and when at school to get a balanced view.
If he is a smart kid perhaps his teachers don't know what to do with him if he is finding lessons boring or needs to be stimulated more.
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May 2013
9:48am, 13 May 2013
12,243 posts
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Discovery Dave
Yeah. I'm going to have to take the morning off, and spend it writing letters and accompanying my ex to the GP. It feels like I'm the only one in his corner now.
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May 2013
9:52am, 13 May 2013
25,318 posts
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Velociraptor
"Intelligent and understimulated" was the first "diagnosis" my oldest daughter received. I was unimpressed, especially as the educational psychologist specifically dismissed Asperger syndrome for reasons related to his own ignorance of how the condition can be manifest in girls. She WAS (and still is) a very able young lady, but she had plenty of intellectual stimulation at home and in school and lack of opportunity certainly was no explanation for her behaviour.
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May 2013
9:54am, 13 May 2013
12,244 posts
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Discovery Dave
I feel quite wobbly and nervous actually. Need to Dad Up.
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May 2013
9:58am, 13 May 2013
6,611 posts
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Chicken Licken
Understable dave.
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May 2013
10:05am, 13 May 2013
12,245 posts
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Discovery Dave
I want to call the NAGC to see if this kind of thing is common, but they're now a helpline and they want £30 to even talk about it.
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May 2013
10:06am, 13 May 2013
25,319 posts
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Velociraptor
DD, please don't let it become a combat situation. When it comes down to it, I hope that you and your XW BOTH want what's best for the lad.
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Fetchie Flab Fighters
Nov 2024