Transgender exercise - Lets Fetch Everyone

80 watchers
Dec 2022
12:23pm, 16 Dec 2022
9,895 posts
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Hark the heRAEld angels sing
Big hugs to everyone feeling raw (heh, autocorrect wanted to change that to Rae, which I guess if I were giving you a big hug you would be, by necessity) right now.

Not just because of any unpleasantness elsefetch, but also because I know this time of year can be a bit shit for lots of people.

It's not everyone's cup of tea, of course, but if you like a) cars, ii) Japan, or 3) mates dicking about on an epic road trip, Mighty Car Mods
https://youtube.com/@mightycarmods
always premier a beautifully filmed and scored feature length film on Christmas day.

They're a pair of seemingly very lovely Ausie chaps that I always find cheering to watch.

I love you all, you beautiful people
🫂
Dec 2022
12:40pm, 16 Dec 2022
46,878 posts
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DingDocMerrily
thnks for sharing the hugs Raemondo
most of the debate else where had me thoroughly confused as to who was arguing what.

As the mother of a Transgender young adult I am keen to understand the issues and what they are facing. They tell me they face anger and abuse and to see how quickly that flaired up on this site which is so kind and caring 99% of the time has shocked me. Perhaps I can now understand why their transgender identity has driven them to not want to live, due to the comments of others.

shame your link isnt working.
Dec 2022
12:42pm, 16 Dec 2022
9,897 posts
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Hark the heRAEld angels sing
Oh, I sorry, just search mighty car mods on YouTube and you'll find it :)
Dec 2022
12:47pm, 16 Dec 2022
7,218 posts
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1step2far
Yes Doc, they are very vulnerable. I thought it was hard being gay in early 2000s but I don't think even then I faced the viterol that's about now. :-(

It's no where near the same, but I get misgendered regularly as im butch looking with shaved hair and have had an increasing number of close shaves where people are so angry and they are looking for trouble that I dread using public toilets and female changing rooms. :-(

I Hooe your young person can navigate things and become happy as their authentic self :-)
Dec 2022
12:48pm, 16 Dec 2022
40,064 posts
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Pinks
Thanks Rae
Dec 2022
12:49pm, 16 Dec 2022
7,219 posts
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1step2far
It's not all bad, generally there is far greater acceptance of people than there was. There's just room for a lot of improvement :-)
Dec 2022
12:55pm, 16 Dec 2022
46,881 posts
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DingDocMerrily
thank you
Dec 2022
1:38pm, 16 Dec 2022
9,898 posts
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Hark the heRAEld angels sing
I'm increasingly realising that it can be very difficult for people who aren't directly impacted to understand the very real harm that 'casual debates' about trans people's existence and rights causes. I'm not sure how to overcome that, particularly when the debate is so ostensibly dominated by GCSE science dropouts prattling about the 'biological truth' of binary sex...

It seems so obvious to me, possibly that's also related to the autism, that trans people, (particularly trans women) are not a threat to cis women - that's cis men that the transphobes are thinking of.

I also see a clear link between internalised misogyny and arguments about excluding trans women from women's sports - as well as lot of very revisionist history about why women's sports exist as a separate category in the first place.

But anyway.

I hope that all the trans, NB, 'non conforming', queer, and otherwise fabulous Fetchies, and those of us who love you, can use this thread as a little life raft in a sea too often troubled with waves of nastiness and scary person eating beasties.
Dec 2022
2:44pm, 16 Dec 2022
2,637 posts
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Flatlander
Thanks Rae.
As those of you who read my couple of blogs at the being of the week about misgendering will be aware, my experience shows that there is a a lot of aggression still about, sometimes seemingly because some people just want to be angry about something, although mostly due to intolerance, prejudice, misconceptions, and ignorance.

I know my experience is nothing compared to that suffered by Trans people and other groups, but it is an illustration of the attitudes still out there.

Do your best not to let those attitudes sink your own little life rafts.
Dec 2022
6:02pm, 16 Dec 2022
426 posts
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ZenTaoPlurp
Thanks Raemondo.

Nearly forgot, never get's old: snow.

About This Thread

Maintained by
A thread about how we can encourage and include people in whatever exercise they are interested in and removing barriers to participation.

Glossary
--------------------
Amendments/Corrections/Requests just ask for a sidebar edit.
This is NOT comprehensive, just some helpful shorthand.
---------------------

Gender Identity ≠ Gender Expression ≠ Anatomical Sex ≠ Sexual Orientation

Anatomical sex = The physical aspects that make you fit into a category based on genitals, chromosomes etc i.e. Intersex, Female, Male...
Gender identity = The internal view of gender, the way you see yourself.
Gender expression = The way you present to others externally through clothing, behaviours, language and other social signals.

Sexual orientation = Who you are attracted to.

None of the above are dependent on any of the others, individuals may relate one to another in their specific case, but assuming what one might be based on observation of another is not a sound basis for determination.

Transgender (Trans) = When your gender identity does not match your identity assigned at birth based on anatomical sex.
Cisgender (Cis) = When your gender identity matches your identity assigned at birth based on anatomical sex.
Non Binary (Enby) = When your gender identity doesn't fall into either of the female/male choice. It may exist somewhere on the spectrum between woman and man, either stable of fluctuating between woman-ness and man-ness. This may encapsulate those that may use terms such as genderfluid, agender, demigender et al.

Pronouns = she/her, him/his, them/they etc...
How to refer best to someone else. Really simply, follow their lead. Ask if unsure, be polite. If corrected, it's not a problem unless you repeatedly ignore correction.

Transition = The process somebody goes through to alter their physical attributes to better match their gender identity and expression.

Dysphoria = The distress a person feels due to a mismatch between their gender identity and their sex assigned at birth. Can fluctuate and be experienced at varying degrees.
Dysmorphia = Discomfort with the shape/form of the body. Present in eating disorders and the like, but can often effect transgender people, with triggers such as body hair presence/absence, chest/genital presentation etc.
Deadname - The name a person is assigned at birth, that they no longer use.

Triggers = Things that are known to cause an effect. Typically, X causes a person to experience dysphoria/dysmorphia. Sometimes these can be managed/avoided, other times they are inevitable.

Acronyms:
amab = assigned male at birth (originally born anatomically male)

afab = assigned female at birth (originally born anatomically female)

ftm = female to male transitioner
mtf = male to female transitioner
egg = state of somebody before becoming aware they were transgender i.e. "their egg cracked when they realised and began to emerge"
GIC/GIS = Gender Identity Clinic/Service, providing transition services
GRS = Gender Reassignment Surgery

General notes:
* Not everyone will be comfortable talking about their situation, depending on where they are.
* Not everyone has the language to articulate how they feel, what they want to say. Be patient.
* These things are NOT static, what you encounter in a person today may evolve into something else later.
* Am I trans/cis/enby etc... Frankly, you tell us. Whatever YOU are comfortable with at the time is what we will adopt. It is YOUR identity.
* This language is weird. Yup, and we (CreatureOfTheHill) as a plural system talk strange too, it's OK. We (CreatureOfTheHill) are not "normal", never have been.
* Am I weird/abnormal? Possibly, but it has NOTHING to do with being here or being trans/enby or whatever. People just are in general, and that is OK, we love you for your quirkiness.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tFL5GTKwonQ


Resources:
Genderbread Person genderbread.org

Related Threads

  • gender
  • inclusion
  • kindness
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